суббота, 29 января 2011 г.

I will never learn to understand men!

I have just jumped to the conclusion, that all men are awful! I will never understand them! They are unbearable, in fact! God acted the very strange way, when he had taken Adam's rib and created Eve of it. Now all men are like nobody home. They just want their rib back and stick to women to get it back! This is called "LOVE". 
Ha-ha! What a silly girl I am. Everything seems to be so easy to understand but impossible to go hand in hand with it. That's my problem!

четверг, 27 января 2011 г.

So romantic!

Hi everyone!
I just was surfing the net for some time and came across this picture. 
This banner is located somewhere in Russia. That's so romantic. This picture made me smile. Hope it will have the same influence on you.
Tomorrow is going to be the last working day. Finally I will have a good sleep... 

среда, 26 января 2011 г.

St. Nina's Day!

Tomorrow I am going to have some kind of a holiday! I am orthodox and tomorrow will be St Nina's Day.

She is my guardian. 
My mother has already  baked the cake. It seems to be very tasty-with berries and jelly. 
Unfortunately I am going to have an extremely very difficult day tomorrow and I will hardly have a minute  to go to church, as I always do it on this day.=(
 Well...that's all. I am going to bed now. 
Have sweet chocolate dreams! 

понедельник, 24 января 2011 г.

I want summer and peaches!

I am in very low spirits now. You know, I hate, when I try to make someone good, but he doesn't want to listen to me and acts in his own way. I hate it!
It hurts me so much now. 
I want summer. I want to be lonely. I want everything disappear. The Earth doesn't need me. People know how to act without my help. They have reflexes. They do not need me. I want a sunny June weather... the river... 1 peach... no music, no cars...fresh air...water, bikini and sunglasses. That's all I need now. 
I suffer. That's my life. 
Nothing is perfect. Hope everyone's glad. 

New plans


Today is the second Monday of my studying after winter holidays. I am quite tired, because I had some kind of a rest only on Sunday as I was studying on Saturday. I am quite tired, because on this  day I was doing nothing but preparing my homework. I even didn't go outside. That's awful, cz my brain refused to work without an access to the fresh air. I was going mad. All I wanted was nothing or smth impossible. In other words I didn't know what I wanted. Oh, oh, oh! That's my eternal problem.
On the other side, I am happy, because it  seems to be easier to study after NY, because there are many holidays and consequently I am going to have some days-off. For instance we are going to have the St. Valentine's Day soon. I know, I won't have a day out, but maybe my Valentine will make me feel happy on this day. At least I hope.
Besides, I  am going to lose some weight. Just a little bit. I am going to give up eating bread and sweets. I have already given up eating crisps and chips. That's not very difficult. It will help me to make my skin look pure and healthy. That's what I am eager to have. Not to mention the fact, that I want to be slim. 
Luckily I am going to get an access to the gym again. ^_^ 
Moreover I hope to go the skating rink finally. I haven't been there this year yet. That's awful! I adore skating! It makes my muscles firm. Hope to go skating this weekend. 
That's all for today. Have a nice working week!  

пятница, 21 января 2011 г.

Smoke out!

I have never even tried to smoke. I absolutely do not like the smell and I pretty well know, that it's extremely harmful for my health.  People take some cigarettes, cigars or whatever. They light them up and put into their mouth and just breathe them in and out with their lungs. That't the wrong way of smoking! That's just a balderdash for kids in order to show that they are brave enough to poison themselves. Ha-ha, that's so funny and awful at the same time. 
 I smoke my problems using my heart. I constantly try to smoke them out, but that's impossible. Sometimes I wish I could smoke cigarettes and sometimes I feel like I need it, but then I realize, that I can't do it and give up the idea. My mind is over my subconsciousness. That's the result of my heart-smoking and staying on my own for an extremely long period of time. That's great. I can completely feel, that I am nothing. Nothing really worthwhile. Nothing really smart, or cute. Smoking kills. In any way. 

суббота, 15 января 2011 г.

Extremely bad mood

I feel myself so depressed. I am depressed very often. Probably I like this feeling. I never want to get rid of it. I think, that high spirits are kind of a «self-delusion. I do not believe in positive emotions. They were possible only in childhood, though not in mine. I think they all are artificial. I feel myself so lonely. All I need is nothing. I am constantly crying, have an insomnia and I have put on weight, to boot. 

пятница, 14 января 2011 г.

HP7, part 1

Oh, oh,oh. I am such a bad girl I am. I had no desire to watch HP7 in the cinema, because of two circumstances. First of all, I had a very bad mood, the second one is, that I love HP and I didn't want to watch the screen version in order not to be despaired as it happened to me while watching the Half-Blood Prince. Today I am in an awful mood and I got a strong desire to watch the 7th film. I watched it at home. Of course the visual and audio effects were modest, I am quite satisfied with the film. 
The actors look the way they are to look like according to the book. They look like 17 years old teenagers, though they are more years old. I dunno why, but I liked it. 
To be honest, I was shocked when I was watching this scene in the café.  It looks extremely the very same way I imagined it while reading the book. I was pleasantly surprised when I saw it.
I also liked the graphic depiction of the fairy tale Hermione was reading aloud to  her friends and Luna's father. It was sooo magical. 
Of course different details are missing, but that's ok. The main idea is transmitted.  
Generally I am satisfied.  

Studying as my own philosophy

I must confess, that I do like studying, especially at university. I have never liked schooling, because it was very difficult for me to deal with my classmates. All I liked at school were my classes of English and German, some teachers and that's all, I guess. Now I am still on my holidays, which have started on December, 26. The majority of students are taking their examinations now, but I am lucky not to do that, as I have finished my semester without any problem. I've got all A and only one C. I find these results great and that is why I deserve so long holidays. I must go to the university on Monday. I am going to have a week of lectures. I've already got my schedule on this first day. I will have four periods a day, as usually since 8.00 a.m. till 14.10 p.m.Luckily I will have no home tasks during this week, but I am going to start reading some books for my individual reading in English and German. I am not really sure whether I have a strong desire to go to the university. At least I will be doing smth useful. The great disadvantage is that I experience a serious lack of a good sleep while studying, cz I either go to bed late because of all my some assignments or have an insomnia. I must wake up at 5.45 a.m. because I am always afraid to be late for my periods. At 6.45 I am already at the stop station, trying to catch a bus or a route taxi to get to the university.  At about 7.00 I am usually at the university, though, as a rule, it is still closed at this time. Then I am lucky to have a long walk around the campus and revise everything what I've learned on the eve while sitting on some bench. That's extremely depressing and tedious. But I am already used to it. That's my lifestyle with no fun, just serious considerations and hard work. As one very clever and intelligent young lady said: "Work, work and no fun." This is now my motto, cz I am working hoping for some good result in the future. In other words I am slowly killing my youth for the future, which I think will not be worthwhile. 

среда, 12 января 2011 г.


Должна признаться, это звучит очень странно. Каждое утро я просыпаюсь со смешанным чувством испуга, страха, разочарования и одиночества. Сердце бешенно бъется под поими ребрами... Каждое утро... И каждый вечер все труднее и труднее уснуть независимо от времени года.

воскресенье, 9 января 2011 г.

A Sailor Went To Sea

Мне сегодня приснился сон, будто бы я на море...так спокойной...пахло свежестью...кожа шелковая от загара...аж захотелось позагорать)

пятница, 7 января 2011 г.


Лазила по всяким блогам и нашла у одной девушки очень миленькие вещички. Особенно мне понравилась у нее шапка. Я уже давненько хочу шапку с большим бубоном. Вот решила связать нечто подобное. 
Я уже как-то раз вязала шапку, вышло очень даже хорошо. Думаю это будет моя вторая, сделанная собственными руками. За день, думаю, управлюсь.

четверг, 6 января 2011 г.

My 7 girlish dreams

These stuffs can exist only in me dreams... I am happy only because I have got a right to dream...
 Wanna get back to dancing, though that's impossible.
A trip to the UK! 
A real absorbing fairy tail.
More HP books with logic-driven ends. (Not like one in the 7th book...ick...) 
I wanna look pretty =)
This dress for my wedding, which I, in fact, even do not want to have. But still the dress is amazing, incredible, marvelous, plush, elegant, pretty...
This dress is also worthwhile. I think it would suit me.
I wanna to have a big house with an awful lot of pets. Love them, cz at home I've already got 2 dogs and 3 cats=) 

среда, 5 января 2011 г.


Deer are constantly chasing me. They are like Santa's ones, cz each of them has got its own name, like Horror, Passion, Embarrassment, Alienation, Confidence and so on, but still they are not Santa's, they are mine, cz I've created them myself. Some of them are small and weak, but others are big and strong.  They are my inner key factors. My deer are wonderful, be sure. They receive candies for their  good job. 


В жизни встречается так мало людей...как правило только фантики...вот потому-то сладости так любимы, потому что сам отказываешься от них, но зависимость еще та. Так и живешь в ломке. Потом как бы умираешь и опять видишь конфету. Вот тебе и dolce vita.

понедельник, 3 января 2011 г.


Я танцами начала заниматься, когда мне было всего 5 годиков. С тех пор, как минимум каждый час, я не могу не встать и не прокрутить фуэте, сделать арабэск или просто кинуть парочку батманов...Даже когда я на учебе, я как-то незаметно делаю батман фондю =) Как классно чувствовать напряжение в мышцах, растягивать их, чувствовать боль, смотреть в зеркало и видеть, что ты способна управлять своим телом и можешь создавать красивые линии на нем... А чего стоит только закрыть глаза и вспомнить наш зал - три больших окна аркой, станки, паркет, зеркала, фортепиано и строгий взгляд руководителя. Выворачивания стоп посторонней силой, поднятия ноги до уха с прямой опорной, осанка, выворотность, соблюдения темпа, высокий прыжок с мягким, совершенно неслышным приземлением... Гулька на голове, трико, балетки с заплатками... Боже, да это же самое приятное, что когда-либо было в моей жизни... О да, это экстаз! И каждый раз ты превосходишь самого себя. Всегда есть над чем работать. И что самое главное, тебе себя совершенно не жалко. Лично я всегда была готова разбиться в лепешку, лишь бы меня похвалили за миллион раз отточенное возле станка движение. Ничего подобного в мире нет. Часок возле станка как разминка, затем заходит руководитель, поклон, аккомпониатор начинает играть классику на фортепиано, уже все знают что за чем делать, вначале правая нога, поворот лицом к станку на 180 градусов, теперь пошла левая нога. Ах, икры уже горят. Ну а на десерт у нас гранд жэте! Теперь "на середину". Теперь иы разминаемся на полу, тоже самое на середине зала (я во второй линии). Сделали, попрыгали. Теперь у меня чувствуются еще и бедра, ну а руки, руки я чувствую всегда. Потом прыгаем еще в продвижении. Что дальше? Верчение. Я люблю русский бег. Повторяем постановки, стали к станку, всем спасибо иии...опять поклон. Апплодисменты аккомпониатору...сутулюсь...тело может отдохнуть...как же хорошо...даже уходить не хочется...хочется вернуться....чувствуется легкая горячая дрожь...это и есть счастье. 


Начну с того, что лыжи имеют достаточно большое значение для всех членов моей семьи. Дело в том, что мои родители познакомились на горнолыжном курорте, когда оба приехали отдохнуть на Кавказ, а именно все действие разворачивалось на границе республик Кабардино-Балкарии и Карачаево-Черкесии, где находится гора Эльбрус. Вот...Ну, я не стану вдаваться во все подробности... (хе-хе) 
 В общем, скорость, снег и высота-это наша стихия. Родители давно хотят поставить меня на лыжи, но я такая трусишка, что постоянно начинаю плакать от страха и доказывать им, что я никогда в жизни не буду кататься на этих лыжах. Прошлой зимой я даже прочитала , навернеое самую любимую папину книгу, "Белое проклятие", Владимира Санина. (Книга непростая, её нужно прочувствовать. Если не был в горах-врядле поймешь в полной мере.) И тут сегодня, так неожиданно, меня поставили на лыжи. Правда не на горные, а беговые. Признаюсь, я и падала, и ныла, но оно того стоило. 

Да, и будьте уверены, я пойду дальше. Я всё могу.  

суббота, 1 января 2011 г.

Привет, мой Новый 2011-ый

This is my NY tree)
Вот и прошел мой любимый 2010 год...Не знаю почему, но мне так нравился этот год, что мне даже как-то уныло стало, что на календаре поменяются цыферки... Ну да ладно, буду надеятся, что этот новый выдастся мне ничуть не хуже, чем предидущий. Самое смешное, что я только-что вспомнила, что можно было загадать желание, вот балда. Хотя, почему балда?  Я почти уверена, что я сама подсознательно не захотела ничего загадывать. Всё равно ведь ничего не сбудется. Я лучше буду продолжать работать над собой. Я уже хорошенько отдохнула и теперь у меня есть новые силы, мысли, идеи и цели, которые я хочу развивать и достигать.